The numbers
Everybody has a private estimate of what everyone else is up to, and almost everybody's is wrong in the same direction. These are the prevalence figures from studies that used real samples rather than whoever answered a magazine survey — which is most of the reason the numbers are lower, and stranger, than expected.
97%
Almost everybody fantasises, and about much the same things
4,175 people were asked in detail. The categories are few.
21%
One in five has tried an open arrangement
Far more than swinging, and far more than most people assume.
54×/year
About once a week, and falling
26,620 adults over four decades. The line goes down.
53%
Half of women have used a vibrator, and so have many men
The first nationally representative count found it was ordinary.
20%
Infidelity is common, and lower than everybody guesses
Around one in five married men, and one in eight married women.
36%
A third have tried it, and the number has doubled
One of the fastest-changing figures in sex research.Browse by shelf
Seven questions
Wondering what would suit you?
Seven questions, two minutes, and one straight answer. Nothing is saved.
Take the seven questions Twenty questions, for twoWould you rather talk about it together?
You each answer twenty questions on your own. Afterwards you see only what you both said yes or maybe to — and a plan for the things you agreed on.
Open Let’s talk about sexGeneral information, not medical advice. Anything persistent or painful belongs with a doctor, who has heard it before.